Tommy herd a crash. The tree branch Robbie was sitting on snapped. Tommy just remembered that the branch was over the pond. The pond was quite wide but not deep. Tommy rushed to his fallen friend. When he got there all he could see was Robbie’s favorite boots .
Tommy called him three times. Robbie stayed stuck in his unconformable position. Then Tommy saw it. A dark red stream of blood. Now Tommy was scared, so with all his might Tommy pulled his friend out of the pond. Then he realized is friend was dead. With an cracked skull.
THE END
It pretty good but also dark really liked how you included the picture to visualize what Tommy saw.
A very sad ending to Robbie’s life.
I’d like to see you combine sentences and try to use transitions to make the writing more fluid.
Mrs. H